258 entries for 2023

Daryl Davis on Reforming Over 200 ‘Ku Klux Klan’ Members - by Befriending Them

[Five core universal values underlie human interaction: to be loved, respected, heard, treated fair, and to want the same for one's family.]

[Treating neo-Nazism as a culture without justifying it enables you to approach the people as with any other culture.]

[Avoid focusing on destruction, hate, or fear as they are symptoms. The root cause of ignorance, cured through education and exposure, will get symptoms under control.]

[How to be offended by insults from someone who doesn't know you? They have no credibility.]

[Allow people time and space to marinate with ideas, avoid impatience. Even if they don't like you, they might give you a return visit, and that's what you want. Don't destroy your credibility by lying.]

[Find and build upon the commonalities.]

when is it valuable to post about something online if you're not the primary source?

[The voice of possibility doesn't need to immediately decide whether something is true, and can accept contradictory arguments simultaneously.]

[Propose to 'disagree and commit' when nobody will have the ideal information anyway, especially if reversible. Try to recognize misalignment and correct quickly.]

[Leader seek to have strong judgment and good instincts. They incorporate diverse perspectives and work to disconfirm their beliefs.]

[When resolving conflict, the voice of power uses force, the voice of reason uses systems, and the voice of avoidance uses inaction. The voice of possibility tries to make conflict productive instead, by facilitating learning, curiosity, understanding.]

[Depersonalize points of view so that people feel free to try out other ones. Plot them on a quadrant of agreement against potential to change.]

no matter how platforms may persuade us otherwise, there is no 'undo send' or 'delete message' in human communication, we can only add context to what has been expressed

[Arguments are an indication of something important, not necessarily bad. It's normal for them to come back like weeds. Not dealing with them to 'avoid rocking the boat' can create anxiousness underlying everything.]

[Try to determine whether it's about being true, meaningful, or useful.]

[Recaps can help ease tension contours after intense learning.]

[If you teach well, people might pay you to help them with things you're skilled at, even without expertise.]

[Putting people in a group or course would yield better outcomes when they have been vetted to have similar needs that can be addressed by your offering. The transactional 'buy and enroll' misses this opportunity.]

[Living documentation that everyone can access. Many people have talked about doing it, but you actually do it in a relational way. Nice reminder of the beauty created through that process. No logic or reason behind it, other than connection, recognizing that something cool is happening and doing it.]

Poorly dressed in other folks' old clothes, with a dog and a noisy borrowed bicycle, I'd see half the eyes in the room wish they hadn't come the moment they realised that it was me giving the workshop. 'this is the guy?!'. Some would quickly look away as if to hide the way their faces openly displayed their shock. I quickly learnt to play off of that, and to enjoy it too; it was the first tension contour to resolve! Knowing that I would resolve that tension, I could enjoy it, a little like sitting in front of a big cake you know you are about to eat, and waiting a little!

[Problematic learners can become observers. Problematic rapports in one-on-one might work out better in a worokshop setting, or in an audio course. Terminating a relationship with the student can still maintain their engagement with the method.]

[Bear with difficult learners as long as they help illuminate deficiencies in your method. Try to convince them to play ball, but ultimately leave the choice with them.]

[Explaining etymology can help mask repetition.]

not a tree shaker but a forest shaker